WeAreTBI.org - The Social Support Network for People Living with Traumatic Brain Injury

Angela

It probably shouldn't.  That's a good way to make you feel like crap.

36 months ago

Sandee

I don't think it should make you feel like crap. It depends on your attitude toward yourself and your accomplishments.  I think each person should measure it differently and that has to be decided by that person. For myself, I measure it by what difficulty I have faced, challenged and how I dealt with it.  I don't compair anything I do now to what I"ve done in the past.  With my lose of dance talents, it makes me a stronger choreogrpaher. So I measure that sucess with my emotional ability in dealing with the lose and see how I've progressed as a choreographer. How each piece evolves in the creative and difficulty level.  I do this in evey area of my life.  From baking to writting to paitance to relationships with people to chronic pain.  I see sucess from how I handle things along the way and the end result.  I am so proud of all my accomplishments so far and ones to come.

36 months ago

Kitania

In respect to the producer, he probably meant success as "the attainment of wealth, position, honors, or the like."  My own definition of success is a bit more basic than that, more in alignment with simple achievement.  As such, I consider that I have had a successful day when I am able to get out of bed, shower, dress and eat.

While those may be actions that a non-disabled person accomplishes without thought (or rest) I consider that to be an exception to what my life is like normally, and it does at times take a great deal of effort and planning (for me) to dress, much less put on makeup, do hair or whatever.

That being said, I also have accomplished goals in my life that seem rather successful to me whether or not one has a TBI.  I have worked in the entertainment industry, and continue to work as much as I am able within that realm.  I have won awards for my writing, presumably against writers with no disabling conditions and/or brain injury.  I have in the past managed to achieve a standard of living that financially exceeded the lifestyles of many others, and have overcome the odds of homelessness, drug abuse, etc. to become much more of a functioning person in society than I was prior to the motorcycle accident in which I received my TBI.

In speaking with other folks in similar situations to myself, I try to remind them to celebrate the smallest of victories.  Sometimes, one might forget that for someone who is agoraphobic, simply going outside is an extraordinary success.  If one was extremely fatigued because of illness or disability, I would consider the day when one is able to get up and accomplishes answering email, or doing a load of laundry a feat worth celebrating. 

To add to an already long thought: with the emotional side effect - depression - that often goes along with chronic illness and disabling conditions, it's a constant source of amazement and inspiration to me that so many of us keep trying, keep moving forward, and have hope for the future.  There may be the slowest of movement towards a goal, but to anyone like me who understands what it's like to be completely overwhelmed by life, health (or the lack of it) and you still wake up - that to me defines success.       

36 months ago

Angela

I see being successful as reaching your full potential.  The only thing is that's different for everybody.  What people end up doing is comparing themselves to others.  And they feel like crap when they see someone else who has done much more.  I don't want someone not feeling good about themself because of what I have done.  Success is personal.  Did you achieve your goals?  Do you need to set new (realistic) ones?

36 months ago